| What do you picture when you dream about your | | | | seemed we'd never see our friend on the walking |
| book's success? Do you envision readers stopping | | | | trails again. We worried when her mother was |
| you in the grocery store with stars in their eyes? | | | | admitted to the hospital. Up and down, her progress |
| Getting on Oprah? Seeing your book in the front | | | | seemed to change like the December wind that |
| window of your local Borders? | | | | skittered across the parking lots at work. |
| Or maybe you dream of your book riding at the top | | | | Judy was absent a few days, then a few more. |
| of the NY Times bestseller's list for months at a | | | | Something felt wrong. |
| time? How about dining with Dean Koontz and his | | | | Then came the dreaded email. The subject line |
| dog, Trixie? Of course, this repast would be followed | | | | always seems to say the same thing. "Sad News." |
| by a glowing, personal endorsement of your works | | | | Judy's mom had passed away, released from her |
| by Trixie, and if you're lucky, maybe Mr. Koontz | | | | earthly bonds and finally free to float among the |
| himself. | | | | angels. |
| Am I close? | | | | When Judy returned to work a week later, she |
| Are you being honest? | | | | shared stories about her mother's final days. One of |
| Over the years I've pictured several of these | | | | them surprised me greatly, and fundamentally |
| dazzling dreams happening to me. Including a | | | | changed my definition of success. |
| multi-million dollar movie deal in which Harrison Ford | | | | Judy read to her mother during her final stay in the |
| plays Gus LeGarde. And of course, the world would | | | | hospital. For hours on end. She happened to have my |
| fall in love with the LeGarde family and beg for more | | | | second book, Upstaged, handy and began to read to |
| each year. | | | | her during her responsive times. Sometimes her |
| I imagined quitting my engineering job, staying home | | | | mother would just lie there with her eyes closed, and |
| to write, making enough money to pay down the | | | | Judy didn't know if she was listening. Frequently, |
| debt and take care of long needed repairs, like the | | | | she'd ask, "Do you want me to continue reading, |
| twenty-six windows that shake and rattle every time | | | | Mom?" Her mother would respond. A nod or a short |
| the wind blows. | | | | word. |
| I envisioned copies of my books in everyone's home | | | | "Yes. |
| library. Worldwide, mind you. Not just in the States. | | | | A nurse perched behind Judy and became involved in |
| Lots of dreams. Big dreams. And all revolved around | | | | the story, too. So Judy would continue reading aloud, |
| the traditional definition of success. | | | | giving comfort to her mother and providing a little |
| Recognition. Adulation. Confirmation that my work is | | | | armchair escapism to her nurse. Solace came from |
| valued. And enough money to take care of a small | | | | the tentative loving voice of her daughter, close and |
| country. | | | | warm. And she was reading my words. |
| A few weeks ago something happened that changed | | | | It floored me. |
| all that. | | | | In a flash, I realized if one woman could be |
| Judy, one of my lunchtime walking partners, had | | | | comforted on her deathbed by my books - I'd |
| been canceling walks and working through lunch to | | | | already reached the definitive pinnacle of success. |
| make extra time to care for her elderly mother. We | | | | You'll never know how your stories will affect the |
| all admired her, watching as she shopped for her | | | | world. Not until it happens. So keep writing and |
| mom, took her to numerous doctors' appointments, | | | | imagine the best. Not the money, not the fame, not |
| and tended to her increasing needs with fortitude | | | | the ability to quit that day job. Imagine affecting one |
| and devotion. She was one of five siblings, but took | | | | solitary soul in their final moments on this earth, and |
| the bulk of the responsibility on her shoulders. | | | | you'll have pictured... the ultimate reward. |
| The cancellations increased in frequency, and it | | | | |